The Pecan Wars

With the arrival of the cooler weather, my hands have been a little busier tending the fall garden, and more recently, joining my husband in the world of pecan farming. Perhaps I should have been aware of it sooner, but my Andrew loves pecans. We're talking huge fan. He likes them so much that he's gone to what some might consider extremes to ward off the pecan's most vicious predator, the Sciurus Carolinensis...better known as the Eastern Grey Squirrel.

I will not soon forget the day that Andrew climbed our pecan tree to remove a squirrel's nest, and came face to face with the feisty critter. Mrs. Squirrel was rather livid that Andrew was attempting to evict her from her home and threw all sorts of chattering insults from the limbs above. At one point it appeared she was ready to go to the mattresses with him. Yikes! Watching from below, I began mentally preparing my speech for the nurses at the ER.

"Well you see, my husband was just attacked by a squirrel. No, it didn't appear to be rabid. He was kind of up in the tree...where it lived...tearing it's house down...with the squirrel watching. Have I mentioned he likes pecans?"

While Andrew's survival skills allowed him to narrowly escape a squirrel attack, he did not evade the notice of the neighbor living behind us. We were yet to meet her, and he said she gave him a pretty strange look. Under the circumstances, I probably would have done the same had I seen a grown man climbing a tree, exchanging words with a squirrel. That is unless that man is my husband. In which case I admire him all the more for protecting our family and our pecan tree from the nut hoarding critters.

It's been a team effort to protect our pecans over the last few months. Andrew did a great job of giving the tree the water and minerals it needed to survive this summer's drought. As harvest time has drawn near, we've been on red-alert for the "fuzzy tailed nut smugglers". Yes, that is what we call them. My watch during the day has at times involved abandoning projects or housework to run hot-footed outside, pellet gun in hand, to try and snipe the little beasts. They truly are masters of sneakiness, so one has to act quickly once they've been spotted.

Being limited with a pellet gun, I've felt like our squirrels have mocked my attempts to scare them off. I've wondered if I might have more success throwing rocks. Or dare I admit that with such a puny gun, my aim isn't as true as it might be with say...a shotgun?! As fun and effective as that might be, I'm sticking to legal weapons like bb's, rocks, and perhaps the occasional house slipper. I figure the whole jail scene might put a damper on my homemaking image.

In attempt to gather as many precious nuts before our nemesis can, we've taken to picking green pecans. This is the stage just before the outer shell dries out and opens to drop the fully developed pecan. My beloved engineer set up a drying station for the green "Kaans" to finish ripening. Picking, sorting, and shelling pecans has become part of Olivia's and my daily routine. She enjoys the hunt and organization of it so much that it's been fun for me, too. One of the only downsides to shelling green pecans is that the moisture from the outer shell oxidizes on your fingers and is next to impossible to scrub off. My brown thumbs won't win me any "Beautiful Homemaker Hands" awards, but heck, the pecans are worth it. And I wasn't planning to enter that contest anyway.

Many a recent evening has been spent before the fireplace, Olivia in Andrew's lap, cracking and enjoying our pecans. After tasting the fruit (or should I say nuts?) of our labor, I can definitely say our war with the squirrels has been worth it. We're enjoying our harvest and Olivia has become a pecan fan like her Papa. Observing our cracking methods, she will grab two pecans, bring them to one of us and ask (and at times, demand) that we "Crack em?". Who can resist such cuteness?! Alas, after all of our efforts to save our pecans from the squirrels, I do believe we've created a squirrel of our own.

Oh, and as an aside, in case you run into any pecan farmers in the near future, please don't judge them by the appearance of their hands. They may have just returned from battle with the Eastern Squirrel and deserve some respect. ;)