Sitting Still

I've never been very good at sitting still. There have always been things to do, and multi-tasking is in my blood. Just ask my Mom or Grandma. That is if you're able to interrupt their crafting of beautiful quilts, gardening ventures, bargain hunting, or tasty food preparations. They are do-ers, and I've come to terms with being one, too.

As mentioned in my previous post, this summer has been a busy one. We've kept the kids fed, the grass short, and completed quite a few big-ish projects. All of the "doing" was satisfying to my soul. The noticeable transformations have been such a delight to wake up to. I can't help but believe that as we've been made in the image of our Creator, Who makes all things new, that it's natural for us to delight in creating, and restoring things, ourselves.

While the doing-ness of the summer kept my hands happily occupied, my mind was being fed by another, long neglected source of pleasure.
Reading.
It had been too long.
Way too long.

I didn't think I had the time. Motherhood is truly a 24/7 job, far more taxing as well as fulfilling than I ever imagined. Unable to remember the last time I had a full night's sleep, I surely didn't think I had the mental capacity to digest a book. But as I have said before, and continually remind myself: If something really matters to me, then I'll make it happen. Triathletes don't just wake up one morning ready to run, swim and bike themselves to the finish line without previous training. Anything worth having requires some due diligence before one can arrive at their preferred destination. For me, renewing the long lost love of reading would require my sitting still. Not multi-tasking. Augh.

With a bit of discipline and the right books, I'm happy to say that the summer also included my re-introduction to the simple pleasure of reading. I haven't read anything as hefty as War and Peace, but so far a couple of new-to-me authors with thought provoking, and encouraging works have been excellent re-training wheels. I've found myself eager to find moments when I can sit down to snag a few paragraphs, and reveling in the weekends when Andrew has the kids supervised and I can soak in a whole chapter. Or two. I love that man. So dearly.

Acquiring a sandbox to promote non-Mommy related entertainment has helped a great deal. Like a lot. Especially when the alternative digging source was the freshly planted fall garden. The need to dig and roll about in the dirt just wasn't jiving with my even greater desire to have fall produce. So, if you have little people in your life between the ages of 2 and 12, and do not have a sandbox, please, for the love of Pete, go get one, and save yourself some sanity. My "Super Aunts" recommended getting one and it's been the best survival tip I've received in a long time. Hours of mostly peaceful outdoor entertainment await, and only at the cost of a little Craig's List searching, a few bucks, and hosing your kid off before they return inside your house. Just do it. Anyway...

What's funny is that as I've made time for reading, I've felt a lot more centered. Not new age-y "centered", but more like my old self/new-improved self/I-have-meaningful-thoughts-other-than-what's-for-dinner self. It's given me a glimpse, even in reading "Mom" type books, that other people are living and moving about in their lives, and even when the poop hits the fan (or misses the diaper), that it's gonna be okay. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that finding an outlet of creativity or time to read is especially important for stay-at-home-moms. I dearly love my children, but have found it a healthy thing (at least for me) to get in touch with the outside world apart from diapers, middle of the night feedings, and catching my kid pick her boogery nose and eating her findings. Too much of that turns my brain to mush. Regardless of who you are, if you find yourself needing a break when it may be physically impossible, find a few minutes to give your mind one. Check out the library, or go online to find something that catches your fancy. Reading-time may only consist of the time you take to go to the bathroom, but it's something.

The newest book in my hands is called "Desperate", by Sally Clarkson and Sarah Mae. I bought it on the recommendation of a Facebook friend and am so very glad I did. Frankly, it's been affirming to my Mama heart, and sweetly soul filling. The first chapter was so relate-able that I questioned if they'd been reading my journal. These ladies can empathize with the intensity of life with little people, as well as offer hope, creative ideas, and encouragement to the weary, "desperate" Mama. I didn't think I was tired until I began reading, at which point my eyes misted, and I wanted to jump up and down, pointing at my head, yelling: "That's me! Over here!". Grace, in place of more parenting rules jump off the pages, which in my estimation is something today's Moms are starving for. As with the sandbox tip, if you're a tired Mom, please get this book and make time to read it. Seriously, make it happen, and you'll thank me. I will accept all expressions of gratitude, including offerings of sand bags after my kids have thrown all of ours out, and are down to the bottom of the box.

P.S. Camo Crocs optional for your own fulfilling reading experience.